


He remembers and...

by kazunarichi



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Canon Divergence, Getting Together, M/M, Reincarnation, Still new to the tagging system, it's not angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-24
Updated: 2015-05-24
Packaged: 2018-03-31 22:17:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,024
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3995032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kazunarichi/pseuds/kazunarichi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Those times are left behind to give way to the present, a modern world, a modern place but perhaps the same people, especially him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	He remembers and...

**Author's Note:**

> I've been reading Naruto for a long time now and this is the first time I write for them. I hope this is ok, I don't know what inspired this but I felt the need to write it. I think this began way too serious and then it gets less and less serious as the fic goes on.

 

He remembers and dreams.

Sasuke has been having dreams since he has memory, of times long forgotten by the world but present in his soul. Places and people that were and are again, of himself representing darkness and sorrow and of another boy, sun made person that shines through his smile just as strong now as he did back then. He knows wrong was done to him more times than he can count but nothing compares to what he did to the person he cared most about, with ideals to handle a burden too much for his young self, with thoughts about fixing the world but wanting to do it alone. Believing he'd be better off without him even though he was his entire world (even if he didn't know it then).

So he fought and screamed and hurt and lost... himself, his world, his light and warmth. Loneliness became his life, being hated his meals, but nothing could fill the dark void that became his heart for it had been ripped from him by no other than himself and no matter how much he tried he could never forget the last words spoken by his... friend.

"I love you... now and any time we meet"

Many and more years later he finds himself remembering those words right before going from this world with just a single thought in mind. _Naruto_.

 

He remembers and does not want to.

Those times are left behind to give way to the present, a modern world, a modern place but perhaps the same people, especially him. Naruto does not seem to remember but still they become friends and this time is different because even if the world is not perfect, they remain together. Sasuke is afraid, even if he won't admit it, of Naruto remembering his past because he understands those were themselves only in a different era but the fact is he hurt Naruto more than anyone else.

That's why he keeps quiet, which is why he tries to compensate today, be a bit kinder, a bit more understanding, a bit more supportive... in his own way. Naruto understands him and that's all that truly matters, it has always been like that.

Sasuke sees him smile because of friends and jokes and _him_ and it fills him with sorrow over his past self, of how he could not see what was standing before him, all hopes and future and promises. He regrets his dreams, his memories, his actions over and over again, he regrets that he can't go back and change them but most of all he regrets remembering and not being able to forget.

 

 

He remembers and wonders.

Going through life has left its scars, some have more than others but all matter the same. Just like his past self, he has suffered, enjoyed, laughed, _lived_ so he asks what is different this time. Perhaps it's just the era, or maybe he has learned from his old life but he begins to wonder is he going to end up the same way as back then. That's when he decides he can carve his future himself, learn from his past mistakes and be better because of them so he wonders again if his other self would have had that chance perhaps he could have been happy back then.

With that thought comes more questions. If he'd had a different end before maybe he would not remember now and if that were true perhaps this time around he would ruin them, more and more ideas start to come of _what ifs_ and _maybes_ until Naruto comes along to get him out of that hole.

"Sasuke, let's go have lunch now"

_Now_. That's all he has and he is going to make the most of it.

 

He remembers and enjoys.

Not all his memories are of dark times. Often comes to mind the times they fought, child fights and petty arguments, Sasuke is always amazed at how fast Naruto was able to rile him up, normally with a cool demeanor, even now, it seemed to evaporate as soon as Naruto appeared in the picture, even now.

Other times are more peaceful and fun times like their mission to uncover their teacher's face (he finally knows what it looks like) or how they had to catch that woman's cat. He remembers their meals together and how he once had to feed him because his stupidity got him in trouble _again_. He cannot forget, and does not want to, that one kiss they had, accidental and more teeth that anything else, not at all romantic and too much miso soup but a memory of Sasuke and Naruto he feels grateful for.

There has been no accidental kiss this time and he is okay with that since he rather has it happen with both parties full aware.

"Sasuke, what are you thinking about?"

"Nothing. Keep doing your homework" Naruto gets distracted far too easy sometimes.

"It's been too long already, I need a break" He complains because he’s been working hard according to himself.

"You just took a break; you can't get another one so soon"

"But this is hard! Give me just five minutes...yeah?" He has his pleading eyes and Sasuke will never admit they actually work on him.

"I'll give you three and then you have to finish" He finally gives in.

"You're worse than the teachers sometimes... Okay"

 

He remembers and worries.

He can't help but feel he's going to fail, that he's going to ruin them both exactly as he did back then. Sometimes he thinks he's just seeing his future in a past self and that there's nothing he can do to change it. When they fight, a serious fight not the daily arguments they have if you could even call them that, he feels troubled.

_What if this is it and we never talk again?_

_What if this is when we part ways?_

And yet he can't apologize, stupid pride gets in his way but he knows this time around he was wrong. He doesn't even have the right to be mad, not about _that_ because he's nothing but a friend although he wants so much more. Feeling like he lost a battle he reluctantly enters the college room they share.

From the door he calls "Naruto" and he barely acknowledges his presence with a noise but remains over his books with his head over his arms while looking at the wall.

"I am sorry" the words feel odd coming out of his mouth but still tries to continue "If you want to date him, I suppose I should be happy for you" _Even if it shouldn’t be any of my business because we're only friends._

"Stupid" Naruto answers but finally turns to look at him "It's not me who Gaara wants to date, he was just practicing how to ask"

He tries to wear his mask, still he feels he can't completely cover the immense relief he feels at those words because it means the world to him. He just hopes Naruto doesn't notice.

 

He remembers and decides.

Sasuke wasn't a patient man when Naruto was involved. He has loved him for a long time, counting his previous life or not, screwed it up back then but not planning to do it this time so he's been careful not to let it slip because even though Naruto did confess his love _then_ he doesn't know it's the same _now_.

It is the same for him but who's to say that didn't change for Naruto because Sasuke didn't automatically loved him when they met, it was a slow process, a lot of smiles, a lot of fights, a lot of words, a lot of actions that had Sasuke falling for him again and again similar to their past lives but not entirely the same.

After a lot of thinking he resolves to finally do it. He is going to talk to Naruto about what he feels what he wants from him and ask if they can work. He also concludes that before doing it he has to confess to what he did because it was him only in another life and he knows Naruto will listen to every word, he knows he won't be judged as crazy and he won't get laughed at while he claims it was just a dream and he knows he has to talk to him before asking for a chance.

 

He remembers and _he_ does too.

He had to wait for the opportunity to come, the timing had to be right and they both had to have time to process what he was going to say because it's not something easy to recognize.

"Naruto, I need to talk to you" this time around he's sitting on his own bed and Naruto on the one across from his "Could you sit here?" Sasuke signals to a space next to his own and Naruto obeys and moves.

"What is it?" He asks with evident curiosity in his eyes.

"It's about us and something that happened... some time ago" It's stretching it a bit but not entirely wrong.

"If it's about the CD I broke I promise I'm looking for it to buy it but it's been really hard to find"

"No, it's not a--"

"Oh! If it's about the money you lent me, I swear I'll pay it back"

"Naruto! Listen..." he breathes, of course he would just start going off on his own

"It's about something _I_ did to you so hear me out, ok?"

Naruto settles down looking at him expectantly after agreeing.

"I... have been dreaming and I know they are not just dreams. That stuff did happen and I hurt you so much, in another life I kil--"

"Shut up!" Naruto interrupts looking at him with his blue eyes and they seem sad "... I know" He lowers his gaze to the floor and Sasuke is surprised because Naruto knows but despite knowing he was still willing to be his friend.

"Since when?" He can't help but wonder because maybe it started recently.

"It started a few months after we met; I started dreaming too and just knew it was us for real"

Or maybe not but then how could he stay so calm and close to him, knowing what he did, wasn't he afraid, wasn't he angry at him for what he made him go through. He had so many questions and no words to ask them but it didn't seem necessary since Naruto began answering anyway.

"I was scared in the beginning because you were so similar but later I realized you are so different. I couldn't help it Sasuke, you became my friend... again" Naruto shrugs like it’s not a big deal and looks at him again and the sadness is almost gone, replaced by happiness.

"I see" What is he supposed to say? Thank you for not hating me for hurting you in another life.... he is satisfied with just uttering "Then I still am sorry for what I did"

"It wasn't you!" Naruto is energetic again and that is good "I mean, it was but not you _you_. What I'm saying is you don't have to apologize because you're you and you're here and it's different"

Sasuke feels relief wash over him because Naruto understands and he's content with that. He almost forgets he's supposed to say something else too. Almost. "I need to tell you something else; it was the reason why I talked to you about the dreams"

"Ok, but before you say anything, I just need to add it’s still true" Naruto is looking at him and he knows Naruto knows what Sasuke wanted to say next "'now and any time we meet'"

Sasuke intertwines their hands and meets his gaze with Naruto's and he feels completely calm while voicing "I love you too".

And they meet halfway like they always have in every aspect of their lives. Only now is to join their lips for the first time in this life and Sasuke thinks Naruto still tastes of miso soup.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope this was ok


End file.
